Truth or Dare may get you killed
by WatchingYou
Summary: The Akatsuki are alone, bored out of their minds one day. So Tobi brings up the idea of playing a game and things just get worse from there...


Title: Truth or Dare (may get you killed)  
Disclaimer: I don't own the Akatsuki or the Naruto universe (or truth or dare)!

Notes: Truth or dare may get you killed if you play with the Akatsuki. I've been in the mood to write today, and write now I want to write about the Akatsuki, so this happened... R&R, Flames will be used to sacrifice people to Jashin.

Rated 'T' for foul language and some sexual themes, but nothing to bad or graphic.  
**X. X. X. X.**

It's dangerous when all the Akatsuki are in one place, and it's even more so if they are all together and are bored. That was the current scene.

They were almost all in one of the rooms in one of their hideouts; the room was simple with several chairs, couches and a bookshelf. The only person who was not in the room was Pain who was off elsewhere doing work.

"I'm so fucking bored!" Hidan complained from his spot on one of the couches, sitting next to his partner.

"Then read a book or something and shut up…" Kakuzu said in response, not looking up from the money he was counting.

"I don't want to read some shitty book…"

"Then let's play a game!" Tobi suggested.

"That's a stupid idea, hmm…" Deidara commented, shooting an annoyed look at Tobi.

"Actually that could be fun," Konan commented, looking up from the book she was reading.

"You think we should play some fucking game?" Hidan said, looking surprised at Konan.

"Yeah, just playing a game would be fun."

"We could play truth or dare," Kisame said, laughing.

"What are we, fucking little kids?" Hidan swore.

"Are you chicken?"

"I'm no chicken! Fine, let's play," Hidan said, giving in.

Soon enough everyone had pushed things aside to make a space in the middle of the room and everyone was sitting in a circle.

"I'll go first," Kisame called out, "Deidara, truth or dare?"

"Dare me, hmm."

"I dare you too," Kisame, stopping for a moment to think, "I dare you to make out with one of your hand mouths!"

"What?"

"You heard me!"

"Fine, hm…" Deidara responded before putting his right hand over his mouth and began to make out with it. This image made most of the group begin to laugh, even getting the emotionless Itachi to smirk and laugh slightly. After several minutes Deidara pulled his hand off of his mouth…

"My hand mouth tastes like clay hmm," Deidara commented, causing even more laughs in the group.

"Alright, if you think it's so funny, truth or dare Kisame?" Deidara asked, slightly annoyed with all of Kisame's laughing at him.

"Truth!"

"Coward," Hidan called out.

"Please, I've played this game before. I stand by my pick of truth," Kisame responded.

"Are you a virgin?" Deidara responded, smirking.

Kisame mumbled something under his breath, looking embarrassed.

"What was that?" Zetsu's black half asked in an almost taunting manner.

"I'm virgin alright?" Kisame yelled out, causing the entire group to laugh at the shark-like teammate. "Itachi, truth or dare?"

"Dare," The Uchiha responded calmly.

"I dare you to dress up as Santa and collect money for charity outside the Konoha mall! You have to have to be loud, cheery, and friendly!" Kisame said, before laughing at the mental image.

"After this is done, I'm going to kill you…" Itachi said a low sinister, voice.

"I can't wait to see this," Kisame said with a smile, ignoring Itachi's death threat.

"I can us there quickly hmm," Deidara said. Soon enough the group of 8 was riding on several of Deidara's large clay birds. Kisame had grabbed a Santa costume before the left and had Itachi dress up when they arrived. This caused several of the members to question why Kisame had a Santa costume in the first place. When they arrived Itachi, dressed as Santa and carrying a bucket and a bell, walked out in front of the Konoha mall and began to shake the bell to attracted attention.

"Ho ho ho, won't you donate money? It's for a good cause!" Itachi yelled out, attempting to sound cheerful, causing his teammates who were hidden around the area to burst into laughter.

"What cause?" A man who had walked up to Itachi asked.

"Umm… it's for… feeding orphaned... bugs."

"Bugs? Is the Aburame clan running this charity?"

"Sure…"

After several people put small amounts of money in the Itachi, attempting to sound very emotional, said, "Thank you so much for your donation! Thank you so much, you're all wonderful people!"

After several more minutes of acting and sounding jolly, Itachi took his money bucket and walked away, meeting up with his fellow Akatsukis at the edge of town.

"Hahaha, you looked like a big pussy Itachi," Hidan said laughing.

"Be quiet or I will find a way to kill you," Itachi said, glaring daggers and Hidan.

"You looked very jolly Santa, are you going to go over your list and check it twice once we get back," Kisame asked, snickering. This caused Itachi to leap angrily at his teammate, attempting to strangle him. It took several of the other members to pull him off of Kisame. The trip home contained more laughter but not much commenting as the others were scared of being attacked by Itachi. Once they got back, they went back to the room and resumed their circle.

"So this stupid game is entertaining after all," Hidan commented.

"Kakuzu, truth or dare?" Itachi said, now dressed in his normal outfit.

"Truth…"

"Fucking coward ass bitch! Pick dare like a man," Hidan yelled.

"Fine… Dare, just shut up Hidan!" Kakuzu snapped back.

"I dare you to burn 1,000,000 ryo (around 1000 American Dollars) (1)," Itachi said with a smirk.

"WHAT? Never!" Kakuzu said, crossing his arms, he would never waste a cent let alone burn 1,000,000 ryo!

"You have to do it, that's part of the game!" Konan responded.

"I'll never do it!"

"Do it or I'll hand-cuff you to Hidan and lock you in a closet all night hm," Deidara threatened.

"No!"

"Just fucking do it! I am not spending the night locked in a closet with you!"

"Fine…" Kakuzu said, sounding sad and defeated. He went to his room and got 1,000,000 ryo and took in into the other room, where Deidara was waiting with a box of matches. Sobbing, Kakuzu light the match and light the money on fire. While it burned, he turned away not wanting to watch.

"Do be such a bitch about it! It's just some money, you got plenty more," Hidan said, earning himself a glare from Kakuzu.

Growling slightly in annoyance, Kakuzu said, "Hidan, truth or dare!"

"Dare me, bitch!"

"I dare you not to swear for the rest of the night and if you do swear, you have to be my servant. You have to serve one day for every time you swear…" Kakuzu said, smirking.

"Why you little-" Hidan began to say before stopping himself.

"What was that?"

"I can do it, I won't swear!" Hidan said, not at all liking the idea of serving Kakuzu for even one minute, let alone a day or more!

"Alright Tobi, truth or dare?"

"Tobi is good! Tobi can do both a truth and a dare!" Tobi shouted excitedly. The others in the group gave Tobi odd looks. Hidan was laughing and smirking, thinking of things to dare Tobi to do.

"That's not how the game works…" Black Zetsu began to say.

"Oh let him have his fun, it can't hurt anything," Zetsu's white side interrupted.

"Yeah, if he wants to do both then why not hmm?" Deidara added.

"Stupid little… Alright, I'll give you a truth and a dare!" Hidan spoke up, laughing.

"Hmm… first I'll ask you a question, if you had to sleep with one of the guys in this room, who would you sleep with bitch?" Hidan asked smirking before slapping his hands over his mouth, realizing he cursed. He did it so often; it had become a habit of his.

"HA! That's one day," Kakuzu shouted, pointing at Hidan.

"Goddamn it!"

"That's two!"

Hidan quickly bit his arm to stop himself from swearing even more, but he did glare violently at Kakuzu, wanting to hurt his partner.

"You're such an idiot Hidan," Kisame commented.

"Watch it fish-stick!"

But before the conversation got to off track Konan asked, "What about Tobi's question? Tobi, who would you sleep with?"

"Umm…" Tobi muttered, obviously uncomfortable with the question. The others would have guessed that he was blushing underneath his mask.

"Just freakin pick someone!"

"D-Deidara-sempai!" Tobi answered, covering his face, feeling very awkward. This caused laughter from everyone but Tobi, who was embarrassed, and Deidara who was staring wide-eyed, and feeling very awkward.

"I'm sure Deidara will sleep well tonight, knowing that fact," Zetsu's black half commented.

"Now what about the dare?" Tobi asked, wanting to get away from the awkwardness.

"I dare you to be a bad boy!"

"But Tobi is a good boy!"

"Well know you have to act like a bad boy. You have to swear and drink and act bad, all that shit," Hidan said, looking happy with his dare.

"Three nights!"

"Freaking bullcrap!" Hidan shouted, censoring himself.

"Alright, Tobi is a bad boy! Tobi will go get some sake," Tobi said as he walked out of the room. Several minutes later he returned with an arm-full of sake bottles, which he put in the middle of the circle. Several people, including Tobi, grabbed one and began drinking.

"Truth or dare Konan, bitch!" Tobi asked, throwing in a swear so he could be a bad boy. Deidara chuckled, having not heard Tobi curse before.

"Dare," Konan answered, ignoring the cursing.

"Alright, Tobi dares you to take your shirt off!" Tobi said confidently.

"Nice dare choice Tobi," Kisame said, smiling.

"Yeah, good one hmm…"

"…" Konan said nothing but removed her shirt, revealing a simple, black bra covering her breasts. Trying to ignore the perverted stares and glances from the guys, she turned her to Zetsu.

"Truth or dare Zetsu?"

"Alright, I dare you to run around Konoha, shouting I'm a pretty little girl," Konan said smirking. This dare caused laughter from the group.

"Alright, let's go," Zetsu responded. After taking the short trip via clay bird, the group arrived at the edge of Konoha. They quickly went in and soon enough, Zetsu was running around screaming.

"I'm a pretty little girl! I'm a very pretty little girl!" Zetsu called out as ran down the streets of town.

-With a random group of teens-

"Are you sure it was a good idea to drink that stuff? I mean can't it make you see and hear things?" One boy asked his two friends.

"Nah, that's not true…" One of the other males replied.

Suddenly, Zetsu dashed past shouting, "I'M A PRETTY LITTLE GIRL!"

"Did you guys just see a multi-colored plant man run by?"

"Yep…"

"Man, I told you it could make you see things!"

-Back with the Akatsuki group-

After some time, Zetsu returned to the group, who were laughing wildly.

"You're a very pretty girl Zetsu," Konan commented.

"Shut up!" Zetsu's black half growled.

"Tobi thinks you're an ugly little girl, bastard!"

"Do you want to die Tobi?"

"Let's head back to the hideout, it's getting late," Itachi pointed out.

"Yeah, after all Hidan needs his rest, since he is my slave for the next three days."

"Fuck you Kakuzu!"

"Four days..."

"Gahhh!"


End file.
